5 Tips on Having the “Body Talk”

1. Start “The Body Talk” Early– By the time your daughter is 8 years old you should have already had the body talk with them. Don’t wait until your daughter come to you to talk about the changes in her body; or better yet don’t wait until someone tells her that she smells before you purchase her some deodorant. The last thing you want is for one of her friends to talk to her before you do because more than likely they will be wrong. Be open and honest during your conversation because trust me the conversation may feel awkward or embarrassing at times. Although this is a serious topic, laugh and have fun with it!! Remember you don’t have to cover everything in one conversation.

2. Provide Normalcy and Reassurance – Puberty can often leave our girls feeling lonely and insecure. As her breast buds start to appear and her hormones start to shift it can be pretty confusing for a 3rd grader….especially if you are the only girl in your class wearing a training bra. Normalizing her feelings and reassuring her that everyone will experience these changes will assure her that she is “normal” and that she is not alone.

3. Always Make Yourself Available– Sundae Sundays are a good time to talk to your daughter about her body changes; however, you should always make yourself available to talk with your daughter. I would recommend you to initiate the conversation, instead of waiting for her to come to you. More than likely she will not approach you. Take the lead with addressing her feelings about the changes as well as being open and transparent about your feeling related to her growing up…because after all she IS growing up.

4. Don’t Worry About Saying Everything Perfectly- It doesn’t matter if you don’t have all of the answers. The main thing is that she is hearing it from you. Just take a deep breath and do the best you can. If there is something you feel that you cannot answer, contact her doctor or utilize this handy dandy tool called “Google”.

5. Points to Emphasize To Her- There is nothing to be embarrassed about. Everyone goes through puberty. She is perfectly healthy and normal. She can come to you at anytime with questions or concerns regarding her body.

References:

Breech, Lesley. “Puberty in Girls: Conversation Starters for Parents”. https://blog.cincinnatichildrens.org/learning-and-growing/talking-with-girls-about-puberty.

Dowshen, Steven. “Talking To Your Child About Puberty”. https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/talk-about-puberty.html.

HAPPY “NATIONAL ICE CREAM DAY”!!

I bet you didn’t know there was such a thing, did you? Or maybe you did!!! Apparently “National Ice Cream Day” became a national holiday due to President Reagan wanting to commemorate the sweet treat on the third Sunday of July…How sway, who knew?!?! I will say that any day to eat ice cream is a treat within itself.

Khristian and I celebrated the holiday by indulging in a pint of Ben and Jerry’s “Half Baked” ice cream. The “Half Baked” is a mixture of chocolate and vanilla ice cream with gobs of chocolate chip cookie dough and fudge brownies. That ice cream was so good we didn’t even capture a picture. If you are on any kind of diet please disregard, ok.

After a long 7 days of being away Khristian returned home yesterday. She and her brother HJ went to Maryland to visit with their PaPa and Mrs. Katie. Oh, me on the other hand I enjoyed some rest and relaxation with my baby daddy, HA!!! Prior to Khristian leaving she and I had multiple conversations about how to care for herself while she was gone. Conversations such as making sure that she bathed correctly, to making sure she picked up her clothes off of the bathroom floor when she finished showering, to remembering to put deodorant on everyday. In my previous post, I shared that Khristian was in the beginning phase of puberty and how her body was starting to change. Therefore, the last thing I needed was for homegirl to forget to put on her deodorant on a 97 degree day.

Our last “Sundae Sunday” before she left consisted of a run through of what her morning and nightly routine would look like. We actually repeated the same routine morning and night for a week until the day she left. She and I went through the steps of washing and bathing (you HAVE to hit those hot spots ladies), putting on deodorant and lotion, and lastly putting on her clothes. I also reminded her to make sure she grabbed all of her personal items out of the bathroom after she was done. I know much of this sounds remedial but as a young girl at the tender age of 8, personal care and hygiene starts early. I don’t think as mothers we should take for granted that we will always be around for our children. The earlier we can teach them to become self sufficient and independent the better. We also can’t take for granted that they automatically know how to care for themselves and do these things. It takes training and patience to teach our daughters these things.

Tonight, I am so excited that she and I are back at the kitchen table for this week’s “Sundae Sunday”. We caught up on her week in Maryland and how much fun she had with her Papa and Mrs. Katie. As she was going on and on about her week, all I wanted to know was “Did you pick up your clothes off the bathroom floor”? She said “Of course I did because I wasn’t at my house”…all I could do was smile and beam with pride in the inside. that note.

On that note, good night!!