5 Tips on Having the “Body Talk”

1. Start “The Body Talk” Early– By the time your daughter is 8 years old you should have already had the body talk with them. Don’t wait until your daughter come to you to talk about the changes in her body; or better yet don’t wait until someone tells her that she smells before you purchase her some deodorant. The last thing you want is for one of her friends to talk to her before you do because more than likely they will be wrong. Be open and honest during your conversation because trust me the conversation may feel awkward or embarrassing at times. Although this is a serious topic, laugh and have fun with it!! Remember you don’t have to cover everything in one conversation.

2. Provide Normalcy and Reassurance – Puberty can often leave our girls feeling lonely and insecure. As her breast buds start to appear and her hormones start to shift it can be pretty confusing for a 3rd grader….especially if you are the only girl in your class wearing a training bra. Normalizing her feelings and reassuring her that everyone will experience these changes will assure her that she is “normal” and that she is not alone.

3. Always Make Yourself Available– Sundae Sundays are a good time to talk to your daughter about her body changes; however, you should always make yourself available to talk with your daughter. I would recommend you to initiate the conversation, instead of waiting for her to come to you. More than likely she will not approach you. Take the lead with addressing her feelings about the changes as well as being open and transparent about your feeling related to her growing up…because after all she IS growing up.

4. Don’t Worry About Saying Everything Perfectly- It doesn’t matter if you don’t have all of the answers. The main thing is that she is hearing it from you. Just take a deep breath and do the best you can. If there is something you feel that you cannot answer, contact her doctor or utilize this handy dandy tool called “Google”.

5. Points to Emphasize To Her- There is nothing to be embarrassed about. Everyone goes through puberty. She is perfectly healthy and normal. She can come to you at anytime with questions or concerns regarding her body.

References:

Breech, Lesley. “Puberty in Girls: Conversation Starters for Parents”. https://blog.cincinnatichildrens.org/learning-and-growing/talking-with-girls-about-puberty.

Dowshen, Steven. “Talking To Your Child About Puberty”. https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/talk-about-puberty.html.

6 thoughts on “5 Tips on Having the “Body Talk”

  1. These are all so important to remember. When I taught middle school, I had a seventh grader who hit puberty but whose mom hadn’t had any sort of body talk with her other than “you’re an athlete, so you probably won’t hit puberty until high school.” I ended up in the very awkward position of having to gently explain deodorant because suddenly no one in the class wanted to be her partner and the other kids were telling her she stank. There were tears and she ended up changing schools over the embarrassment. Thankfully the school nurse fielded all of the menstruation questions.

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  2. Omg! I can’t even tell you how much this is needed. My daughter is 7 and she’s already showing me body image insecurities. Thankfully, she’s only been homeschooled and I have some time to really spend with her without that constant judgement and bullying. Her love languages are Quality time and gifts. I’ll make sure we have this talk very soon!

    Liked by 1 person

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